


Geass Gets in Your Eyes

by ligmageass



Category: Code Geass, Mad Men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:01:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27511210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ligmageass/pseuds/ligmageass
Summary: The Black Knights need a marketing strategy. Don Draper is the man for the job.
Kudos: 1





	Geass Gets in Your Eyes

Don Draper smokes. “So...you’re telling me…” His New York accent is perfect. “That you want me to design a campaign for your organization.”

Lelouch nods under his onion-shaped mask. “Yes. That’s correct.” He speaks like he’s just seen an archenemy suffer bodily injury.

“You see...I can do that.” Don Draper assures him. “I just need direction from your...organization as to what you’re selling.” His pauses indicate his sophistication, or so he believes.

“We are selling...Justice!” Lelouch shouts the last word, causing his ears to ring inside his ridiculous mask. Don smokes again.

“Okay, I can do that.”

Two days later, Lelouch returns with two women in tow. Their hair colors remind Don of a Christmas tree. The holiday is tomorrow, and Don Draper has spent the last two days drinking and cheating on his wife. He is terribly hungover, sweating at his temples, and has not put an ounce of thought into this presentation. His sycophants have. Pete Campbell nervously adjusts his horrifically-receding hairline and begins. Pete prattles on about favorability polls or some dumb shit until Lelouch stands up. 

“I want to hear Don Draper’s pitch,” he announces. “We came to hear the best, not some soyboy.”

“E-excuse me?” Pete has been cucked by Don once again, his self-esteem shattered into tiny pieces. He’s barely holding back tears.

“Well, you heard the man.” Don projects confidence, handsomeness. He imagines fornicating with the Christmas women, although the red one looks a little young. Nevermind that now. It’s time to Do What He Does Best.

“The Black Knight...it’s a symbol.”

“For Justice,” Lelouch adds. He doesn’t shout this time.

“Exactly.” Don starts to pick up steam. “A masked protector…an everyman.” He grabs up a dry erase marker and walks up to the whiteboard. “These symbols have been with us...since we were children. They’re an essential part of our cultural legacy...passed onto us from our parents.” This was where the magic happened. “This is what we want the emotion behind our message to be. We want a message that says: ‘The Black Knights will protect you...the way you believed you could be protected by a hero when you were younger.’ We want a message in tune with the stock tales behind it...tales of good triumphing over evil...with dragons being slain. With princesses being protected.” He’s really rolling now. No one can stop him, not even his wife with her constant need to ask him questions about himself. On the whiteboard he writes: “The Black Knights: A Sword For Justice” and sketches Lelouch’s helmet around the words. To cap it off, he draws a sword behind the mask, pointing directly downwards. Pete Campbell is misty-eyed and shamefully somewhat erect. Don Draper has done it again. Don lights a cigarette, enjoying the afterglow. Maybe he could get the green one alone on the way out...

Lelouch rises and inspects the drawing. “What the fuck is this shit?”

“I...beg your pardon?”

The green-haired woman reaches into her pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. She silently hands it to Don Draper. It says “Don Draper will make up some shit about childhood and family because he’s cheating on his wife and has no family.” Don reads it and then passes out in an alcoholic stupor. His hair remains perfect even after he smashes his forehead on the table.

Lelouch and the watermelon girls leave Pete Campbell behind in the conference room to clean up Don’s mess, as usual. They’re in the elevator when Lelouch tells them: “We’re going with the geass symbol with a giant dick rammed through it. It’s gonna be cool as fuck.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” the green one asks.

“It’s what I’m gonna do to you later,” Lelouch declares. He has never had sex.

“What’s Geass?” asks the other girl.

“Ah, shit.”

In his dreams, Don Draper is a child again. On a television set, he watches families go about their everyday activities in perfect bliss. He can’t wait to grow up and make a bunch of money from this shit. He’s living the American dream.


End file.
